As I read the news this week, I noted a number of critical incidents that were reported. Two firefighters died fighting a fire in a skyscaper in lower Manhattan, that has been vacant since 9/11. Hurricane Dean claimed lives as it ripped through the Southern Caribbean. The earthquake in Peru killed 500 people, injured 1500 others, and left thousands of people without potable water, food or shelter. Six men are missing in a collapsed mine in Utah and three rescue workers died trying to rescue them. And these are just some that were reported in the national news. There were more. Local news media in my community reported others, that will not make national headlines, as will be the case in many communities, nationally and globally.
It’s not easy to hear such devastating news, especially when there is so much of it at one time. Of course, the closer it comes to touching our lives, the even more difficult it becomes to negotiate.
There’s many ways that people try to cope with such reports. The following are some of the more common ones I hear and some thoughts about their effectiveness:
Some folks that I talk with say they just “don’t watch the news”. We certainly recommend that parents keep young children away from the news, and it is often good for adults, as well, to limit the their exposure to the graphic details of a tragedy. However, as anyone who has tried to avoid hearing the final score of an important football game knows, the news can filter down to you, even when you try not to hear it. So, it might help to have an additional strategy in the wings.
Other folks tell me that they sit down, have a good cry and feel more able to face the news as a result. I’m always glad to hear that one. If we can tolerate our more intense emotions, experiencing them releases tension and can return us to a calmer, more relaxed physical state. It can also help us to confirm that we have the emotional resources to face tragedy. And, after facing our feelings, we are able to return to our usual routines, with less conflict and distraction.
Have you noticed that many people have the need to tell others about the news they’ve heard? When we call up a friend to talk about something that happened in the news, we are putting a very powerful coping mechanism into action. Sharing our shock or distress with another person we trust, helps us to feel less alone with our concerns and fears, and that can be very comforting to human beings. Discussing the critical incident with someone else, also allows us to sort out our thoughts and feelings, and the ways the event is impacting us. This can help make the events feel more manageable.
Yet other folks cope with the news by doing what they can to help. When we have the availability and resources to do so, taking action can counteract feelings of helplessness, which are very uncomfortable for most of us. Additionally, when we make a donation, or speak out for some change to make people safer, or provide some type of direct assistance to those affected, we reconfirm our empathy and caring for others. This not only helps those in crisis, but lets us feel good about ourselves. And the more comfortable we are with ourselves, the better the chances that we will cope well.
Those that recognize that previous traumas are surfacing often tell me that they took the opportunity to do more work on them, either formally, with the assistance of a helping professional, or informally. A move to address these is a positive step, which can increase coping capacities and pay emotional, behavioral and interpersonal dividends in the future.
If you have some other helpful ways of coping with what you hear, when you turn on your television or log on to your computer, I hope you’ll share them with all of us. For tomorrow’s news is coming…